Obama Returns to Indonesia Chasing Trade Not Chickens
In President Barack Obama's 2006 book, "The Audacity of Hope," the then-freshman senator described growing up in Indonesia as a "joyous time, full of adventure and mystery — days of chasing down chickens and running from water buffalo."
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Jeff Dunham – November 08
Image by rosefirerising
Jeff Dunham Tix
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Jeff Dunham – November 08
Image by rosefirerising
Mijn werk is zo simpel: Jeff Dunham's Peanut Explains Business Analysis http://t.co/lSMCC03 via @youtube – by wozke (Wouter Slager)
Jeff Dunham and all his "dummies" LIVE in concert at the St. Pete Times Forum! http://westgateownerevents.com/?page_id=3352&ref=tw – by WestgateEvents (Westgate Events)
I liked a YouTube video — Jeff Dunham – Achmed the Dead Terrorist – sub ITA http://youtu.be/G-M2N9lbme4?a – by maruscya (Andrea)
Jeff Dunham Trivia!
on the show Jeff Dunham Achmed's very special christmas peanut messes up the twas the night befor christmas word and makes it rude to jus so can u tell my the lyrics thanks.
Answer by Nikki M
Jeff: And now, The Night Before Chirstmas.
Peanut: This would be a good time for the muslims to go to the bathroom…
Jeff: Twas the night before Chistmas
Peanut: And all the Jews were at the movies…or eating chinese food…
Jeff: Will you?!
Peanut: What im just trying to include everyone!
J: Twas…
P: HOLD IT!
J: WHAT?!
P: Who the he** says twas?
J: Its in the story!
P: Well its old and stupid!
J: Its tradition!
P: …tis it?
J: Twas the night before christmas and all through the house…
P: Why is it always a house…
J: What?
P: You know there are kids who live in apartments…how do Santa Claus get to the kids in the apartments Uncle Jeffy?…He has to buzz his a** in *makes buzzer sound* Santa Claus…
J: And all through the apartments not a creature was stirring…
P: Except for the a**holes in 2B…theyre drunk and hitting each other with manores…oy vey…thats jewish for holy sh**…
J: …Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
P: Mouse? YOU WISH! YOUR IN AN IMPARTMENT! THATS A RAT!
J: The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
P: And believe me the room could use some fresh air…seriously how the he** did that tradition start?
J: What?
P: Hanging up dirty landry and hoping Santa will fill it with goodies YUCK! Id like to suck on this candycane but it smells like dads feet! Good thing the tradition wasnt a jockstrap…Sally whats in yours? …Nuts…and mommy says there magicly delicious…
J: YOU ARE RUINING THIS STORY!
P: Well your the pervert eating out of your own jockstrap! Isn’t this the part where the kids are sleeping with sugarplums dancing in their heads?
J: Yeah
P: What does that mean? I think they’re huliucinating, these apartment children are on drugs…Santa’s gonna bring me a GIJOE and a bong…and Daddy wants a hohoho…ITS DADDY AND THE THREE HOES…
J: With momma in her cercif and me in my cap, we had both settled down
P: FOR A BIG SNORT OF CRACK!…aww…guitar guy your in the story too… Look, you have to get to the part where Santa gets busted for breaking and entering, where the he** is that…
J: ITS NOT BREAKING AND ENTERING!
P: Oh, keep reading i think it counts…
J: As i drew in my head was turning around, down the chimney Saint Nicholas came with a bound
P: He fell down?
J: …Yes
P: And doesnt say his face was red?
J: Yeah
P: WHY DOES NO ONE SEE THIS! THIS GUY IS DRUNK OFF HIS A**! This is a horrible, horrible story
J: He was dressed all in fur to his foot, and his clothes were all covered in ashes and soot
P: Fat, drinking and driving, wearing a furry gay outfit, covered in soot and smoking, and YOU let him in the house because he said he had something for your kids…WHAT THE HE** KIND OF FATHER ARE YOU ANYWAY! If i were you I’d check his ID then tazer his fat a**! How fat is this guy anyway, everyone is always leaving him plates of cookies, I bet he’s a diabetic too, dont you think? You oughta leave him a plate of insulin how bout that? Can’t wait to hear this story next year, The Night Before Christmas Part II, Santa is on dialysis and he’s missing a leg…and all his little dollys have poloyosis…
J: CAN I FINISH THIS STORY?!
P: Oh please do…
J: He spang to his sleigh and to his team gave whistle
P: Got to go quick cause there’s a cop with a pistol…
J: But I heard him exclam as he drive out of sight…
P: Merry Chirstmas too all, oh crap, i ran over your bike…
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